started pre-natals again today....

i couldn't resist writing today....the one year anniversary of our very first IUI we ever tried. after months and months of planning, temping, taking pre-natals, POASing, etc, of course , so i guess you could theoretically say we started TTC in like january 2011, but still. feels like a landmark day. perhaps obviously, that first try didn't work. neither did the next 5 we did over a span of about 8 months. (first with swimmers from NW and then later with a KD, who appeared miraculously just as we were realizing we couldn't afford to purchase anymore!). we did those first couple of tries as IUIs at our crunchy womens' clinic, then the remaining tries at KD's or our home. it was great fun , but never worked. after the 6th try KD and his wife were still happy to keep trying, but i wanted to nip this thing in the bud and started trying to hit up the doctors. [LONG PARAGRAPH ABOUT MEDICAL STUFF, SKIP IF YOU WANT TO!] my midwives did the minimal tests that they were equipped for, and discovered everything looked good except for my estradiol being very low, but unfortunately they didn't know enough about what that might mean, so they sent me to my GP. my GP sent me to an OB-GYN (after first annoyingly expressing surprise that i would even attempt this without medical help. i felt like saying, and did YOU talk to a doctor before you slept with your husband??). the OB was great, but wanted to send me to a fertility clinic, which i wasn't (and still am not) sure my insurance will cover, since i can't prove i've been having heterosexual sex for one year (or ever, really). so i appreciated his help but wasn't sure where that would lead....luckily, he decided to do some basic bloodwork while i was there, and it turned out my thyroid was very high (or was it low?). this sent me back to my GP so i could get a referral to an endo (gotta love HMOs!), who turned out to be awesome. my first visit with her was in, i believe, april, and she has been playing with thyroid medicine ever since then, trying to get my levels in check. (before each visit with her i have to go to my GP to get bloodwork drawn a few days in advance, and once i even had a thyroid ultrasound...that was kind of interesting. not exactly the type of ultrasound i was hoping for, but you do what you gotta do....). she also basically diagnosed PCOS just by looking at me (apparently my chubby tummy is a dead giveaway . at the last visit she also put me on metformin. so far i haven't had any of the side effects the pharmacist warned me about, and i begin to suspect it might actually be working! (i had what i think are ovulation pains the last two cycles i've been on it, which i never had before!). she treats diabetes in her practice, and was able to prescribe it as a 'pre-diabetes-so-you-don't-get-it' kind of a drug, but she and i both know it's a fertility drug (at least a low level intro one). i think she 'gets it' and understands the troubles i might have getting fertility clinic stuff covered by insurance, so is trying to do whatever she can to help me avoid that. she also has me on prescription strength vitamin D, but don't ask me how that's related. my next appointment with the helpful endo is 9/6, and i'm really hoping that on that day, she will say my thyroid levels are back to normal and i can start trying again!! of course there is always the chance there's something ELSE wrong with me, but for now i'm going to pretend that was it, i'm magically cured, and will be able to get pregnant within a couple of tries. hmm...gotta start working accupuncture back into the budget, too. speaking of budgets, i was seriously considering putting off TTC because i applied for an internship which i would have absolutely LOVED to take, and i have gotten to the final rounds of the selection process....but i think i've realized that we really won't be able to afford life on that salary. it's an OK salary, but not great, and it's more work than i do here so would probably have to quit my part time job or jobs...which just isn't financially feasible quite yet. i'm bummed because i LOVE this job possibility (community organizing inter-faith residency) but the one amazing awesome thing i realized by not taking it--i can concentrate on BABYING immediately!! instead of trying to plan it around the residency calendar and health insurance and what have you. so counting down to 9/6 appt and hope it's good news....

and the passing of time goes on....

we haven't given up TTC! just kind of forgot about this blog :) and we've been on a kind of hiatus...not from the process itself, but from active insemming. after february, that was 6 tries for us and i wanted medical advice. our donor and wife would have been happy to keep trying a few more times, but for me it would have felt like wasting time (and sperm!) (and ben and jerry's!). so i headed off to start a string of doctor visits. to summarize: to my midwives for bloodwork, who found my estradiol was low. sent me to my GP, who didn't know what to do and sent me to an ob-gyn. missed that first appt because of traffic but got there eventually. he was nice, but wanted to send me to a fertility clinic and i still don't know if my HMO would cover that. in the meantime he did basic bloodwork for the heck of it and discovered my thyroid numbers were way off. back to GP, who referred me to an endocrinologist with a diagnosis of, and i quote "hypothyroidism and infertility." yay! that means i have it officially in case i ever want to try a fertility clinic :) the endo is an awesome lady who i've seen twice now. she's been trying different dosage levels of synthroid to regulate my thyroid, and i think we're getting close. to figure that out i have to have my blood taken every time we try a new dose, and a few weeks ago i even had a thyroid ultrasound (interesting). at this last visit she also prescribed metformin, which is for diabetes but also used as fertility drugs. holy cow! she essentially is givin me (low-level, introductory, but still) fertility treatment without sending me to a fertility clinic! so freaking awesome. so now i take three pills a day, some with food, some without, and a prescription-strength vitamin D once a week. she suggested still not trying actual insemination until we get the thyroid worked out, and i totally agree. after the next time we draw blood (late august?), i'll start charting again and if the numbers are right, maybe try again a month or two after that. i'm pretty sure our donor and his wife are still up for it. this could actually work! i really truly believe that. also we now have a dog and lord knows i don't know where we're going to put a baby, but we'll manage :)